"Fact: According to Huffington Post during the last 15 years 20% of people killed by the police were Black women."
"There were recent rallies in New York and Chicago. According to the For Harriet post, only 20-50 people in New York City, one of the world’s largest cities, showed up for Rekia Boyd’s rally. What is wrong with that? Well thousands showed up in the cold, in the heat and rain for Black men who were killed by law enforcement. There were marches, rallies, tee shirts, hoodies, think pieces and hashtags for their unjust murders and rightly so. But what gets me is that more people will show up for a pair of sweat shop made Jordan’s than for Rekia’s rally. More people will stand in line for a movie than Rekia’s rally. More people will stand in line for overpriced coffee than show up for Black women and girls. We shouldn’t be surprised. Our actions are a reflection of our priorities and in the Black community, Black women and girls don’t matter."
from BOUGIEBLACKGIRL.COM
The low show, no show turn out for the REKIA BOYD protest in New York City made many-a black women some variety of sad, bitter, and disappointed. But the sadness, bitterness, and disappointment were incredibly low key because most of black women that pay attention to their own issues on a regular basis were not surprised.
However, the thing that absolutely enraged me was NOT the comment by a black woman on a black feminist website. The comment below was born of self-esteem trodden into the mud repeatedly. I understood that immediately. But the thing that made me want to run, jump, scream and shout was the fact that nearly 350 black women who like to consider themselves strong and undefeatable clicked "like" on her response to the news that no more than 40 or 50 people showed up at the protest for Rekia Boyd.
The quote:
"Nobody cares. Nobody cares about us alive...do you think they give a f**k about us being dead.WE as Black women don't even support each other. We rip each other second asses over light skinned vs dark skin, natural or weave. White college vs Black college. I am so f****n angry right now. I am so angry at a lot of shit. I see why Black women are killing them selves. I really do.
Nobody cares about us. Then 12 words later, it's black women's own fault anyway. It's the victim's own fault. This ought to sound familiar. There's a significant percentage of white people saying this about black men like Trayvon Martin and Eric Garner. But you know who is NOT saying this about black men? Other black men.
This is where we, as black women, and black men differ. But we shouldn't.
A few days before this was written, a white woman in an anti-racism group asked me if black women hate themselves.
In hindsight, I should have said, 'Yes, we often do. We do hate ourselves, but only because we've been brain-washed into believing we are petty enough and stupid enough, simply via being absent a penis, to just instinctively hate each other instead --as if craving light skin and long hair are something some of us want independent of attracting the attention of black men.
And some women simply do not understand that hating self is very different and a lot more poisoness than hating one another. In fact, we need to bring some honest hate into our love for one another - so we can communicate what's really going on between us and use what there is to use or let it go.'
Compare the arguments of black men: Cornell West and Michael Eric Dyson have been at each others throats for a while now. They've been called petty themselves but they have not been pointed at and used as an example of how all black men are petty, just one example of millions of black men bringing black men down, so far down they don't even show up for another when they are shot... and in fact that's why they are being shot <------ (Extreme Sarcasm. But do you see how messed up and self-defeating this type of logic is?)
Black women don't hate one another either. Not really. We hate our individual selves for not being enough. And we hate ourselves without even realizing it. This is very different from actually hating one another. Furthermore, when we don't get support when we should we move onto kicking our collective selves - much like a child blames herself for being physically abused (All I have to do is behave better.) The quote above is a perfect example of this.
Until black women get honest
- about where our desire for light-skin is being reinforced- about where our desire for long, straight hair is being reinforced
- about being so desperate for the attention of black men that we hopped, jumped, and skipped over one another to support black men's views on supporting Clarence Thomas over Anita Hill. (A gift that STILL keeps ON giving)
- about being so desperate for the attention of black men that we hop, jump, and skip over one another to support their views even after we see a woman get cold cocked on video by a man 3 times her size. (Whiny voice: 'Well...we don't know what happened before the video" ala Eric Garner)
-about being so desperate for the attention of black men that we support them with zero demands for reciprocation
....then the low turn out for the NYC Rekia Boyd protest is what we should expect. Most of the black women who will not stand up and be counted as feminist or womanist will continue to be desperate enough for the attention of black men that they will NOT show up where black men do not show up. And that's probably true for at least half of those of us who identify as feminist or womanist too.
In short, our love is mis-spent for the most part.
Women of every race are competitive about things having to do with attracting the attention of men That's universal, unfortunately. However, as black women in the United States we need to rise a step above. We have oppressions others do not have. We need to turn our disappointment and bitterness with the f**kery outward. And I don't mean we need to aim it at black men either
...at least not right away.
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I want to see some of the hatred we feel for our individual selves and our collective selves turned outward toward one another for long enough to have a real conversation about real issues that SHOULD be real issues.
Dark Jealousy and Light Denial of Privilege are are as real as White Racism and White Denial Of Privilege. And if the causes of all these things aren't exactly the same, then they are so parallel and traveling so close together that you can barely tell them apart.
For Example:
"Oh my God, we're all black"
is meant to convey the same message as
"There's only one race, the human race"
and that message is "Shut up! How dare you make me uncomfortable!"
Everything coming at us from the media tells us that the majority of black men prefer light-skin/long-hair....either or both. Actors, Singers, Music Videos, Sports Stars, Movies, and Television - 24/7.
Everything coming at us from the media tells us that the majority of white people prefer the light-skin/white features/long hair...preferably all three . Movies, Television, Magazines, Catalogs, Make up counters in luxury stores and drug stores - 24/7.
With all this going on, why in the h*ll wouldn't there be some self-esteem issues among light, medium, and dark skinned black women in the United States?
And colorism isn't just happening in the U.S. More than once I've heard that 70% of Nigeria's women use skin bleaching products. Asia's numbers are near 60-65% In the U.S. we as black women would have to be deaf and stupid to not have these same things affect us, as bombarded as we are by television, magazines, movies -- especially the black entertainment version of television, magazines, and movies
In other words, the paper bag test is not gone. It's only been transformed. And those that loved the paper bag test did not die, they had children. And since women are judged on looks so much, we are the ones bearing most of bruises that colorism leaves behind.
Dark skinned women are jealous because they have something to be jealous about. The only thing left for dark skinned women to do is say "ouch" and admit it.
But light-skinned privilege doesn't have to be all bad news. In decades past,when the light-skinned person got in the door first, we all cheered. We still do. Most black people have always seen this as breaking through a glass ceiling. However, the turn around and help a darker sister out part? That's the part that's not happening. How could it if you deny you have privilege - privilege that's hard to see, hear, and touch because it simply seems "normal" to you? But when you deny you have privilege what else are going to do but mimick the worst of white people saying, "I got mine. Now, you get yours."
How is that unifying?
As black women we need to argue about we need to argue about then come together. We need to honestly acknowledge where we are the same, where we are experiencing life differently, and how to use everything we discover to our advantage. Black men won't respect us until we respect ourselves enough to say, "Come correct or BYE!"
And until black men respect us enough to value our deaths at the hands of white police officers as much as they do their own, we are not one people.
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"CONCLUSION: The Revolution WILL BE INTERSECTIONAL or it WON'T BE MY Revolution" For Harriet
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